Life throws so many punches at you, it’s amazing because I’ve felt like I can take any punch thrown. The day the punch was thrown and I was made aware of Damian’s death was a day I’ll never forget . I keep replaying in my mind how painful it felt. It was unexplainable , I’ve never felt a hurt like it before . I truly didn’t know if I was dreaming or not. I saw tears , it was dark, my kids were watching me . All I kept thinking was “no”. My body was engulfed with every emotion possible and I needed Damian that much more . So when the initial pain sets in that’s I guess what you would call denial. Which makes all the sense in the world. I think we carry denial forever and I keep envisioning Damian walking in the door. Is strength taught? Is strength something you already possess? And can it truly be lost? Death challenges your inner workings. It’s an everyday challenge and a true test of self. Denial makes sense and its ok. I never thought of a day without Damian and so his death was even harder. I have been so used to Damian exisitng in the physical world that im still in disbelief. Its a shock phase that doesnt last forever. Nothing lasts forever. Feelings are meant to be felt , embraced and then released. People dont die. Life is full circle dont fear what we cant see and dont know.